quirky quirksters

i'm just going to get right into it. my kids are quirky. besides nose-picking. because everyone does that. well, almost everyone. scarlett enjoys smells. she can smell a piece of paper and say, "mmmmm, that smells just like so-and-so". i guess you could say she has a true talent, if you wanted. london, on the other hand, is bit more strange. let me explain.

last night scarlett, after having been tucked in tightly not just two hours earlier, came upstairs to my room & interrupted my magazine reading with this:

"my toe hurts." i'm thinking to myself, wow. that's a new excuse. so being the compassionate mother that i usually am not, i ask, "your toe? why?" she proceeds, "london bit off my toenail." she then thinks it necessary to show me.

"sick!" (told you, not very compassionate.) "um, what happened?!" (it was bitten down to the part where it begins to hurt & gets a tinge of blood. yeah, i know. what. the. hell, right?)

"well, she said i could sleep in her bed if i let her bite it." (did i ever mention my kids are master manipulators?)

laughing, mostly out loud & a titch to myself i say, "well, why'd you let her do it?"

"i wanted to sleep with her. do you have a band-aid?"

and there is nothing more to say concerning that.

the other day london and i were reading together in my bed. as she was reading, i noticed her voice sounded a bit off. i looked over and noticed a whitish, transparent piece of something hanging over her lip and then pop into her mouth.

i interrupted with, "what is that on your lip?"

giggling, she replies, "my toenail." (yeah, really effing hilarious)

i get this look of utter disgust on my face; i can feel it. and say, "your toenail? and you're chewing on it? in mybed? that is sick. don't drop it in my bed, london. i'm not kidding."

read, read, read some more. then,

"uh-oh. i dropped it." swiftly pull back the covers, rummage, rummage, rummage.

nothing. nothing.

"i can't find it."

"reading time is over. out of my bed."

funny thing is, lee does the exact same thing: reads & talks with a toenail hanging from his lip. i have no one to blame but the man i married.